Last Night I Dined In Hell...

[sophieisgod]

And it was TASTY. Sweet Jesus, 300 was incredible. I mean, I knew it was going to be good, but WOW. Just... Ach.


That was possibly the most cliched of any pull quote ever, but if they can pimp it shamelessly in the trailers than why the devil not?

Okay, so obviously the visuals were incredible. There was never any doubt about that. It's a film that completely needs to be seen on the biggest screen possible (Louise! IMAX!) because it is that fucking beautiful. The lighting, the fact that the blood looked like red poster paint, that there were shots that were ripped straight from the graphic novel...

Gerry Butler as Leonidas was a bit good. I loved that he kept his accent, that Scottishness just made him sound like he was snarling. And is it wrong that I quite liked his little braid thing? Anyway, the fact that they made him slightly warmer than his character in the book melted my bronzed, bloodlusting heart completely...
"My queen... My wife... My love" Oh Leonidas, the things you do to me.

The Captain was Eudoras from Troy! The guy seems to be building his career on playing the right-hand man to legendary hard bastards. However, this definitely shows progress from Troy. For one thing, he wasn't Leonidas' eager bitch. And he got to do some very hardcore fighting indeed. And he got to be very anguished when his pretty son got decapitated.

Stelios! Fucking yeah. He was obviously the coolest Spartan of all time, ever. Evidence?
The cheeky glint in his eye
The line "Then we will fight in the shade."
The crazyinsane jump and then slicing off WhipGuy's arm.
Leaping out of the shield formation and then OVER Leonidas.
Hell, even his fucking king thinks he's awesome.

Astinos was very, very pretty. I really loved his relationships with Stelios and his father. Especially with Stelios, it was rather Legolas/Gimli... And he was pretty. So very pretty.

I liked that they kept cutting back to Sparta, and the whole Gorgo/Theron struggle. And they did try to empower Gorgo to a reasonable extent. I mean, it's completely a boy's film, what with all the gratuitous female nudity and suchlike, but I think she held her own.

Hee! Karl from Love Actually playing a piercings freak with a god complex. Beautiful. And camp as Christmas!

Ahh, Daisy Wenham. I knew you wouldn't let me down. Dilios VS RandomPersianGiant was beyond awesome. And I do love to see Daisy leading a charge... I got quite emotional at the end of the film, started having RotK flashbacks and everything. Plus, he was sporting a rather lovely head of hair. And the pecs! Good lord.

Which leads me nicely to my next point. The ripped, honed, digitally enhanced male flesh on display in this film was actually breathtaking. And it was set off rather nicely by the fetching leather underpants and red cloaks combo they were rocking. Hey, if I had it, I'd flaunt it too. And it wasn't just that it was exposed, it was that it was oily and sweaty... And I'm going to stop now before my laptop explodes.

Now, I know I've been desensitized by the media, but it surely isn't healthy for me to appreciate stylized ultraviolence as much as I did. I mean, when you find yourself thinking 'That decapitation was fucking beautiful', is it time to seek help?

And the soundtrack! I must own it.


So, yeah. I'll be seeing that again.

And the Sunshine trailer was incredible. Excited now!

Comments

[darkangsty42.livejournal.com]

GAHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Just GAHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Gerard's snarl was fantastically animalistic. Thus making everyone extremely horny.

Stelios fucking pwnd EVERYONE. And his relationship with Astinos was cute.

Gorgo pwnd too. I want to be her when I grow up. The first time I saw it, the theater exploded with applause when she killed Theron.

Oh, Daisy...

As for the violence, pft. I just saw The Departed for the first time last night, and the violence was beautiful in that as well.

The soundtrack is made of so much good. I've been listening to it on loop for the past week.

[thedreamygirl.livejournal.com]

What is 300 about exactly? I've heard the name of the film mentioned several times but never with a summary.

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

It's about the battle of Thermopylae ('hot gates') in ancient Greece, which was basically 300 (geddit?) Spartans against about a million Persians.

Essentially, the Spartans were really badass warriors defending this tiny pass, and they would hav won if they hadn't been betrayed and then outflanked. Anyway, the film is based on this awesome graphic novel by Frank Miller, very stylized and VERY violent.

It's magnificent, although probably not one for the squeamish.

[thedreamygirl.livejournal.com]

Ah. Now I get it :)
Sounds interesting. And dont worry; years of CSI has meant that I am completely immune to being squeamish over blood and gore. However, FNL proved that I can still be squeamish over older-woman, very young boy relationships. Go figure.

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

I second your GAHHHHHHHH. It was so much better than I was hoping. In every concievable way.

Snarling = Animalistic = Horny..... Oh yes. Also, real men eat apples on the battlefield.

Gorgo was righteous. In the graphic novel she doesn't even speak, so I loved that she was so completely controlled and powerful in the fillum. Applause? That's awesome. There were so many moments when I wanted to cheer, but even though the screen was packed out no one else seemed to be doing it. So, I settled for flailing like a fool whenever anything awesome happened. Which was often.

Ohhh, Daisy...

I still haven't seen The Departed, but the promise of much violence makes me want to lots and lots.

Is the soundtrack on sale, or did you download it?

[darkangsty42.livejournal.com]

Apples are the funny fruit of choice.

I only remember her for like, one frame in the book. She was so badass. But then again, Sparta is synonimous with badass.

The Departed made me fail it was so good. It was so angsty, and corrupt, and violent, and sexy, and foul, and did I mention angsty? :) And Ray Winstone's in it! When I saw him, I turned to my mom and was like "is that who I think it is?" Twas very random. And every time Matt Damon popped up I had the overwhelming urge to scream "Matt Damon" a la Team America. But he was very good in this. Just a scumbag. And Leo was pretty and tattooed and angsty. Yum.

[movie-licious.livejournal.com]

Oh wow! Did you really like it? When watching it, I was rolling my eyes at the cliches every few minutes.
Of course the visuals are stunning, that is both- colours and Gerry's abs :P But there's nothing more than that :(
Moreover, why the fuck did 300 have a narrator? It was sooo annoying. For example the scene when 300 are watching Persians on boats during the storm. Spartans are all ecstatic except for Leonidas. So what does the narrator do? Says that everyone's is happy but the king is calm. For fuck's sake! I can see that!
Acting wasn't bad (I like the way they portrayed Gorgo- finally a woman with balls :D ), but I hated the dialogues. Like the one in the end:
Stelios: It is an honor to die by your side
Leonidas: It is an honor to have lived at yours
Oh pleeeeeeeease!

Don't get me wrong- 300 was one of my most anticipated films of the past few years. It's not that I don't like comic/epic movies. I do (sometimes). But 300 was waaaaay below my expectations :(

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

I think with a film like 300, you have to embrace the cliches. Part of what I like about it is that it was so completely ridiculous!

I kinda agree about the narration, it was a bit unneccessary and heavy at times, but I think it was worth it for the scene at the end with Dilios leading the army into battle. And I can't hate anything David Wenham does, I love Faramir too much! :)

And yes. Gerry's abs are magnificent. I watched Tomb Raider 2 for Gerry Butler, that's how hot he is.