My Kingdom For A Picspam...

[sophieisgod]

Shakespeare + hot fellas = PHNAR

So, The Merchant Of Venice. We have Kris Marshall, Charlie Cox (because I told three_nails I would), Jeremy Irons and a rather greasy Joseph Fiennes. Enjoy!


So, this is Shylock. He isn't very pretty, so there will be few pictures of him.


This is Antonio. And I know there's some Jeremy Irons lovers on the flist *coughaggusscough*, so I feel no shame in the face that I find him really rather sexy. Even if he does break the 'older than my dad' rule.


Antonio has manly gay unrequited love for Bassanio, who is Joseph Fiennes. Why hasn't he been properly attractive since the late 90s?






This is Lorenzo. He is played by Charlie Cox, and is therefore ADORABLE.




Seriously, for a man in his sixties, The Irons is looking good in that open-necked shirt.




Hee! Bassanio's posse. They look badass in capes, yo.


This is Gratiano. When exactly did Kris Marshall get sexy? He wasn't sexy in My Family. Well, maybe he was, but in a vaguely special needs sort of way. Anyway, phnar.




NECK PORN




Bassanio, brooding. He does this quite a lot.


Bassanio, being slightly rakish with a cup. He is quite greasy, isn't he?


I want to give Antonio a hug.


Bassanio inadvertently taunts Antonio with his crotch...


...And with his lady. Now, Lynn Collins, playing Portia, does look a little bit like a vacant cat, but she does have very nice hair.


Bassanio flirts Antion into submission until he gives him money to go and win his lady.


And then MAN KISSING!


See? Nice hair.


Grr, Kris Marshall.




I'm not sure why he's wearing that hat, but I think I love him.


Mackenzie Crook, randomly.


And again, now with comedy costume.


This is Jessica. She's Shylock's daughter and Lorenzo's ladyfriend.


Have I mentioned that Lorenzo is ADORABLE? Because he very is.


More Gratiano, loafing sexily.


Oh, I just want to give him a hug. But, like, a dirty hug. I also want Stardust to be released in the UK, already.






LOOK AT THAT SMILE!


*melts*




Eep!


Awww. And also NECK PORN!






Hee! Silly clothes.


Hee! Silly face.


Seriously. Sexy.


So, Bassanio cleverly solves the puzzle thing that means he can marry Portia. But, look at the left of the cap. I WANT TO BE GRABBED BY KRIS MARSHALL, PLEASE.


Okay, I like this. Manly pose, bit of chest... Nice.


Kissing!


Actually, Joseph Fiennes looks much better in profile. I think it's because his nostrils are rather unfortunate from the front.


Oop! Gratiano wants to marry someone too!


Man, Kris Marshall looks like such a good kisser. And that's quite a creepy observation to make.


PHNAR


Yay, Lorenzo! He brings a wife, and bad news.




Antonio's gone broke, having borrowed money from Shylock, who now wants a pound of flesh. Everyone is sad.


(Brooding!)




So, the boys head back to Venice to sort it out, but Lorenzo stays to run Portia's house. Look how awesome his cape is!


Ach, this scene is too cute to spam over.




LIP-BITING!








So, Antonio's in court.


He is sad, both because he is in court and because his boy doesn't love him.


Court makes people hug, angrily.


Portia shows up, in drag. This is way less kinky than it was when Viola did it in Twelfth Night.


Jermey Irons agrees with me.


RAGE FACE


Looks like Antonio's going to be losing some weight pretty quickly...


Random courtroom cuteness


Manly courtroom weeping


Okay, now Antonio is STRAPPED into the chair.


Steady on, lads! This is a PG!


Al Pacino, being awesome.


Anyway, Shylock is outwitted by girls, who then outwit their husbands. Bassanio and Antonio share a lingering look.


Gratuitous lesbian kissing!


Aww, Lorenzo.


Profile!Fiennes!


And now, let us drop the curtain on Delicious Kris Marshall


Exeunt

Comments

[themis.livejournal.com]

Came here from obasc. I have to say, this cemented my long-held belief that Ralph is indeed the sexier Fiennes. But it also reminded me of how adorable Charlie Cox is. This is totally moving up a couple spaces on my Netflix queue.

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

*stares at your icon, mouth slightly open*

I agree, Ralph > Joseph. :D Especially in The English Patient... Not so much in Harry Potter.

[kyasuriin.livejournal.com]

lol. Oh come on! Voldie doesn't do it for you?

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

Call me shallow, but I just can't get past the nose thing.

[themis.livejournal.com]

Joseph seems to be turning into Nicholas Farrell. Whom I LIKE, but he's not...sexy. (That I've noticed, particularly.)

American accent aside, Ralph is definitely sexiest in Quiz Show for me. (Hence the icon!) And even sort of in Harry Potter. But I guess after making Nazis hot, it's not much of a stretch to make Vodlemort weirdly alluring. I think it was the Hallucination In A Suit version that did it for me. Mmmm.

[kyasuriin.livejournal.com]

I have told you I heart your picspams, right? *luffs* Now I must see!

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

*blushes* Oh, you.

Watch it! Watch it for the capes!

[piyo-halliwell.livejournal.com]

This is Lorenzo. He is played by Charlie Cox, and is therefore ADORABLE.

::melts:: Oh, me love me some Charlie Cox. I really want to see this movie now.

Oh, and you totally made my night with your pic spam, lol, thanks!

[mo-shmoe.livejournal.com]

I always like a film that makes life in the Middle Ages not completely and utterly suck, like it did in reality.

I actually prefer Joseph to Ralph, because my brother is almost identical to Ralph (no joke), so the sexual vibes just AIN'T THERE.

(Oh, unless we're talking acting skillz, in which case--yeah, Ralph).

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

Yeah, didn't quite convey the stench of Venice, but whatever. There were capes!

Re: your brother. Well, that's understandable. :D I do think Joseph peaked in 1997, though. That was a good year.

[three-nails.livejournal.com]

CHARLIE COOOOOOOOXXXXXXXXXXXXX!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Mmmmm, thank you for this =D.

When exactly did Kris Marshall get sexy? He wasn't sexy in My Family. Well, maybe he was, but in a vaguely special needs sort of way.
LOOOL. I saw a couple eps of My Family this summer so I totally know what you're talking about. Also, he's from The Four Feathers and played the most sad, innocent, adorable character and if I ever meet him in real life I will just SQUISH him to death! =)

Lynn Collins is totally Steven Strait's rl girlfriend. So I hate her.

Mackenzie Crook, randomly.
FTW!! It's still so random to me that he is in all the Pirates movies. He just IS Gareth from The Office.

Oh, I just want to give him a hug. But, like, a dirty hug. I also want Stardust to be released in the UK, already.
I AM WITH YOU! And I kinda can't wait for his hottness to be released on the rest of the world/the rest of my flist. He is SOOOOOO ridiculously goofy/adorable/HOTTTTTTT in Stardust.

Wow, Joseph Fiennes is kind of hottt, I think I forgot this.

So I need to see this movie =]. Thanks for the spam!

[sphinxvictorian.livejournal.com]

Actually the best thing I've seen Kris Marshall do, apart from his Gratiano in this film which was wonderful (though his dialogue is cut way down, sadly, the character's funnier in the play), was in Doctor Zhivago as Pasha/Strelnikov. He nearly broke my heart in a couple of the scenes from that.

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

Oh, that was so sad! And Hans Matheson was also delicious.

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

You're very welcome! :) Oh, Charlie. I yearn to see you in your white Stardust coat.

My Family was so very rubbish after he left. When it started I was kind of obsessed with it, and Kris was perfect. Now, it sucks. But he's more famous, so it's all good!

She's the person that kinda sorta looks like Emily Browning? How random.

I WANT STARDUST NOOOOOOOW! This really isn't fair. *pouts*

Man, when Shakespeare In Love came out I was ridiculously in love with Joseph Fiennes. Because who knew that Shakespeare was so hot? And then Elizabeth! With the sexy dancing! I think I need to rewatch...

[sphinxvictorian.livejournal.com]

Also came here from obasc. Great screencaps, though I must protest that Lynn Collins is far better than just nice hair. She's one of the best Portias I've seen. And considering her acting background, it's even more amazing. She had a wonderful air of intelligence, and although she was young, I thought she was full of the wisdom and beauty described in the play.

Also, Joseph Fiennes is a fine looking young man, and I would like to shoot the designer who thought that long greasy hair was the way to make him look more - what? Sexy? Renaissance-y? I don't get it!

Otherwise, I have to say that I love this film, and not just for the eye candy! ;)

[muldersgun.livejournal.com]

another follower from obsac here.

am I the only one enamoured of Jeremy irons? He's pushing 60 but goddamn he's fine.

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

Dude, I have a serious thing for Jeremy Irons. He might be skinny and old but the man has got it!

[psychie.livejournal.com]

I was just thinking about how badly I want to rewatch this film!!!! I am madly in love with every man in it.

And Joseph is the sexier Fiennes. :D And better actor. MWAHAHAH.

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

I know, right? There's no one who isn't righteous and hot.

YOU ARE WRONG, WRONG I TELL YOU!

[psychie.livejournal.com]

I only speak the truth.

:D

[betteroffer.livejournal.com]

That is a bizarrely sexy cast. It totally shouldn't be, but it strangely is.

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

Hee! I luff them, in all their random hotness and their capes.

[kiratollan.livejournal.com]

Thank you! This made me smile and I really needed that now =)

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

You're welcome! Ahh, the cheering powers of pretty men in period costume...

[kiratollan.livejournal.com]

Yay for pretty, talented men. =)

[lucent-dusk.livejournal.com]

Charlie Cox is as cute as bed bug! So cute! And Jeremy Irons is indeed quite sexy, even at the advanced age of 60-ish. *swoons* Thanks for the picspam!

[darkangsty42.livejournal.com]

Jeremy Irons presence makes up for the fact that Joe "Bug-Eyed" Fiennes is there.

Al Pacino used to look good. The Godfather, anyone?

Also, IS THAT GAIA? Cause if it is, can I kill her?

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

Mmm, Jermey Irons. I have Brideshead Revisted on DVD but have never watched it. What is the matter with me?

Eve in Heat, he wasn't bad.

THANK YOU! I couldn't place where I knew her from. Kill away. Even if she hadn't killed Eirene, I'd kill her out of the Cox-McKidd-Stevenson envy frenzy.

[darkangsty42.livejournal.com]

Probably a lot. :) My mom keeps ranting and raving about how good it is, but I still have yet to see it. I did read the book though, if that counts.

d00d, bitch had it coming.

[curlybeach.livejournal.com]

Capes! Brooding! Brooding incapes! Cape-y brooding! AND KRIS MARSHALL NECK!PORN OMG.

Ahem. Was directed here from obasc [one day I will post a picspam of my own, that will match up to the wonders of yours and others over there], and this picspam made me squee and flail rather too much.

Jeremy Irons can't be that sexy. It makes my brain hurt. HE IS OLD. BUT SEXY. *explodes*

I think I've only found JFeinnes sexy in Shakey in Love, and possibly Martha, meet Frank, Daniel and Laurence ... though I agree that he looks better in profile.

And did I mention ... KRIS MARSHALL.
When exactly did Kris Marshall get sexy? He wasn't sexy in My Family. Well, maybe he was, but in a vaguely special needs sort of way. Anyway, phnar.
I found him oddly attractive in My Family, and felt awful for soing so, because I think it was in an 'Awwwh, he needs his mouth wiping' kind of way. But I agree with the 'phnar' sentiment. In fact, 'phnar' may be my new favourite word.

^_______________^

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

Capes and NECK PORN and brooding are all good things :D Especialy the NECK PORN.

DO IT! The internet needs more picspam!

Jeremy Irons has been sent to try us. Like in Lolita. HE IS A PAEDOPHILE. BUT SEXY. That film is proof that I should not base my moral judgements on the hotness of men.

Shakespeare In Love, and Elizabeth. I remember I got so excited when I heard he was in Enemy At The Gates, and then he turned up with dodgy glasses and a weird face. Pfff.

KRIS MARSHALL INDEED. I think I'm going to go and rewatch Love Actually to see if Colin, God Of Sex has a tasty neck also.

I think it was in an 'Awwwh, he needs his mouth wiping' kind of way.
Hee! And phnar.

[rayslady.livejournal.com]

nick became sex!!!! WHEN?
Love him in the broadband adverts...I follow those like a show. I want them to have a baby! *is nerd*
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

Oh lord... I did thiS last night, and then I got all overwhelmed when I saw the BT advert this morning... IT'S ON NOW!!!!

[rayslady.livejournal.com]

yeeks! Which one??
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

The "We can make another folder" one, where he touches her face all smexy like. Grrr.

Ohh, Esther Hall. I'd want to have his babies, too.

[rayslady.livejournal.com]

phnar...the love
xoxoxoxoxoxo

[http://users.livejournal.com/_faeriequeen/]

Oooh what a fab lot of pretty! I'm totally with you on the illicit Jeremy Irons fancying btw...but mostly all I have to say is KRIS MARSHALL!!! I slightly regret not hanging around after seeing Treats as it would've been awesome to meet him. He was so hot in that play...despite being all violent and controlling. Rawr.

I have an audio version of this play with JRT playing Bassanio and Bill Nighy as Antonio...which I really wish could be in pictures instead!

And yes I really need Stardust NOW too.

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

Argh, I forgot you saw that! Curse you, Londoner! He is such a beast... And grrr, Jeremy Irons.

JRT?! Sweet. That would be really rather hot.

Why are they making us wait? *anguished wail*

[http://users.livejournal.com/_faeriequeen/]

JRT?! Sweet. That would be really rather hot.

Oh hell yes...JRT + cape = askfdhsdfhgk!

[agguss.livejournal.com]

AWWWWWWWWW! &hearts I love when people associate me with things! :DDD Your comment made my day :) And yes, Irons is pure love.
SO, your picspams are always great, I think it is your comments that make them so good :) And this:

Man, Kris Marshall looks like such a good kisser. And that's quite a creepy observation to make

made me laugh so hard, partly because I also thought he looks like a good kisser and then because I also thought it was weird to be thinking that :P But what can I do.

Ralph > Joseph *nods* :) (mmm, I just realized you made the same comment with th > sign down there... oh well) I'm note erasing it lol.

[edge-of-night.livejournal.com]

Kris Marshall will always, unfortunately, be Nick from My Family or Colin in Love Actually with that crazy manic grin. LOL Although, I have watched him on Murder City and he was not quite as goofy...but still, these caps are interesting! For once Joseph Fiennes looks kinda decent.

[three-nails.livejournal.com]

Hey, did you take these caps? If not where did you get them? If so are they up for grabs =]? Could we maybe use them over at period_stills? =D

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

Yeah, they're mine. And of course you can use them over there! Just drop me a link over when the contest's done so I can see how they turned out.

Eep! Are you going to make Charlie icons?

[three-nails.livejournal.com]

Yay, thanks hun =D.

You know it, baby ;D. haha, that is, when I actually get the time to make some icons. I haven't made any in like a month!

[vivere.livejournal.com]

Ummmm, marry me Charlie?

[dollsome.livejournal.com]

We just watched this movie in my Shakespeare class, and I loved it. And this picspam, my friend, is the stuff of legend.

Charlie Cox, how are you so adorable? I had no idea he was going to be in the movie, and then he showed up and my heart did a dance of glee. Also, I feel you on the Jeremy Irons thing. I get that he's old, and stuff, but yowza. (To be eloquent.) And he makes pining look so good!

Is there any chance I could use some of these here caps for iconning-type purposes? The internet has totally failed me in my search for a gallery or something, and this movie is just way too pretty not to icon.

(Also, er, don't mind me commenting on this really old post!!)

[sophieisgod.livejournal.com]

He,, thank you!

I DON'T KNOW HOW HE DOES IT BUT I'M BLAMING THE SMILE. Ohhh, that boy. Jeremy Irons.... I tell myself it's okay because he's aged really well and he basically looks like he did in Brideshead? But whatever, he pines so well!

Use away! If you could make one of Charlie Cox's adorable face at the windowledge, that would be magnifique, because, well, his face!

O HAI THAR ARTHUR/MORGANA!